Which "thank you" are you more likely to read? The note that opens with 1) "Thank you for meeting with me" or 2) "Your company's disciplined approach to..."?
Number 1 makes me yawn. "Another lame thank you note," I say to myself, although I'm impressed the writer bothered to write when so many people don't.
Number 2 makes me think, "Hey, this person listened to me! They're writing about one of my company's key messages."
Recruiters and career counselors tell job hunters their communications should focus on the company that they're pitching instead of on themselves. One way to achieve this is to start your "thank you" note with the words "you" or "your," and then convey your appreciation later.
A friend tried a variation on this when requesting an informational interview from a senior executive. He opened by citing an article that had quoted the exec. "You said '...' in this article, which interested me because...' " He got the interview.
The power of "you" isn't just for job hunters. It boosts the power of most communications--blogs, brochures, articles, websites, white papers, and more. Try it and see!
Related posts
* Which topic should you discuss in your client email's first paragraph?
* Your mail has three seconds to grab your reader's attention
* To "dear" or not to "dear" in your email
____________________
Susan B. Weiner, CFA
If you're struggling to pump out a steady flow of good blog posts, check out my five-week teleclass for financial advisors, "How to Write Blog Posts People Will Read," and sign up for my free monthly e-newsletter.
Copyright 2010 by Susan B. Weiner All rights reserved
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I wrote several responds before and ended by comments by stating: "Thank you for reading my comments." Any advise / comment on my end note or respond?
ReplyDeleteAnonymous,
ReplyDeleteWhich blog post comment are you referring to? Can you give me a date?
It wasn't on Blogs. It was respond to articles that I read. I could email them to you if you want (Warnings - lots of grammatical erros).
ReplyDeleteIf I understand you correctly, you're looking for a critique of your writing about some articles. I commend you for wanting to improve your writing. However, I charge for critiquing other people's writing.
ReplyDeleteSorry if I miss communicated. I don't need anyone to critique my writing. Normally, I don't mine people language at what I wrote, criticize my idea or grammar. Besides, If the individual don't like my opinion delete the email. My opinion is free. I didn't write any articles, but responded by ending my writing by stating: "Thanks for reading my comment." Just want to know your thought on it. Some people think its childish. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteAh, so you're asking if it's okay to say, "Thanks for reading my comment." Sure. Why not?
ReplyDeleteBut I don't think it's necessary in many cases.
"Thanks for reading my comment" sounds very deferential, as if you're a low-ranking person talking to a very high-ranking person.